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| Definition of a hero
heˇro Pronunciation Key (hîro) n. pl. heˇroes
1. In mythology and legend, a person, often of divine ancestry, who is endowed
with great courage and strength, celebrated for their bold exploits, and
favored by the gods.
2. A person noted for feats of courage or nobility of purpose, especially one who has risked or sacrificed his or her life.
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Happiness is when what you think, what you say and what you do are in harmony.
~Mahatma Gandhi | | |
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Endurance is nobler than strength, and patience than beauty.
~John Ruskin |
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The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched. They must be felt with the heart.
~Helen Keller |
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The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience,
but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy.
~Martin Luther King, Jr. |
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Thursday, December 2, 2010 Volume 2, Issue 52
Our primary focus is our own recovery and rebuilding our own lives. We will lead by example and not interfere with another's recovery. |
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Beyond Addiction | |
Improving our understanding of alcohol and drug addiction
Good Living
The sky was crystal clear, but it was 8 degrees, and a biting wind made it feel even colder when I tentatively ventured outdoors for a jog. "Winter in Minnesota" isn't a satisfying excuse when the treadmill in the basement has logged its last mile and doesn't work anymore. I still needed my adrenaline fix.
Near the Salvation Army shelter on West Seventh Street in St. Paul, I passed a man shuffling his arms and legs in a slow-motion mimicry of my fast-paced jaunt. His outfit was the antithesis of mine. I wore tight sweats, an expensive Windbreaker, Nike gloves and a matching headband to protect my ears. He wore a woolen red hat, a dirty parka, a logger's thick canvas work gloves and muddy boots. From his matted beard hung ribbons of frozen snot -- or something like that.
"It's too cold to be out here," I shouted. The weather is always a good way to connect with strangers. Besides, my grandfather Papa Henry taught me that respect starts with acknowledging others we encounter during our day. No wonder it sometimes took him 20 minutes to walk two blocks. He always was stopping to talk to people.
I had no intention of halting my exercise routine, but the man's response interrupted my singular focus on finishing my run so I could get home to eat my breakfast and warm up. "Out here today is called good living," he said, smiling at me through a cloud of icy breath. "Good living comes with the attitude of gratitude."
Recovering addicts and alcoholics often cite this "attitude of gratitude" as an important perspective for staying the course despite life's challenges. But I can't recall ever hearing it cited by a man outside on a bitterly cold day who probably is struggling with all the problems that come from being homeless -- or at least dependent on The Salvation Army for the basics. And it forced me to consider how fortunate I am in my life, even though lately I have been focused more on what's wrong with my circumstances than on what's right.
What a gift. What a surprise. Wisdom from a stranger who doesn't have a home of his own or a decent place to work, if he has work at all, whose meals require him to stand in a long line and eat what's served rather than what his favorite is, who most likely got his clothes from a shelf of hand-me-downs others didn't want. Does his family know where he his? Or worse, do they even care to know?
My big regret is that I didn't stop to find out more about him. I waved and ran on to catch up with the rest of my busy life. Still smiling, he waved, too, and kept jogging slowly in the same spot. I don't know whether he got anything out of the encounter. But I did, and I've been keeping pace with his attitude ever since.
December 12, 2009 by William C. Moyers |
Look For the Joy in Life Now |
In our busy, harried lives, it's tempting to focus on what we haven't accomplished and what we don't yet possess. That trap of more, more, more only alienates us from our loved ones and our connected-ness with a Higher Power. The solution to reconnecting to what's important in life can be as simple as getting in touch with the power of gratitude.
With practice, it is possible to redirect our focus from large, daunting problems to life's small, beautiful blessings that are ever present and ever sustaining.
Cultivating a true sense of gratitude is more than counting our blessings and saying thank you for what's good. When we're learning to speak the language of gratitude, we learn to say thank you for everything in our lives, whether we feel grateful or not. That's how we turn around circumstances that frustrate or disappoint us.
The benefits of nurturing an attitude of gratitude are numerous. A sense of gratitude immediately gives us a sense of perspective when facing problems. Gratitude helps us make the most of resources at hand. And above all else, a sense of gratitude helps us truly recognize the presence of a Higher Power in our lives.
When we hoard what we have been given, we block the door to receiving more. If you are feeling stagnant in your life, share some of what has been given to you. Let go of some of the sorrow that you have experienced by sharing your experience--and the compassion that you have learned from it--with another. Share your success by teaching someone else your methods. Share in the abundance given to you; donate to a favorite charity or church. Give of your time, your money, your abilities. When you give, you open the door to receive more.
Someone once asked the artist Georgia O'Keeffe why her paintings magnified the size of small objects like the petals on a flower--making them appear larger than life, and reduced the size of large objects like mountains--making them smaller than life.
"Everyone sees the big things," she said. "But these smaller things are so beautiful and people might not notice them if I didn't emphasize them." That's the way it is with gratitude and letting go. It's easy to see the problems in our lives. They're like mountains.
But sometimes we overlook the smaller things; we don't notice how truly beautiful they are.
God, teach me how to enjoy and savor the pleasures, gifts, and talents that are spread out before me.
Be grateful you're where you are at this moment. Don't worry about trying to hurry the future along. Look for the joy in life now.
Let yourself have all your emotions and feelings about losing people and moments you loved and cherished. Feel as sad as you need to. Grieve. Then let the feelings and the past go. Don't let your memories stop you from seeing how beautiful and precious each moment in your life is now.
Melody Beattie, is the best-selling author of Codependent No More. In her many best-selling books, including Stop Being Mean to Yourself, Codependent No More, and The Language of Letting Go, Melody Beattie draws on the wisdom of Twelve Step healing, Christianity, and Eastern religions. She lives in Malibu, California. | | |
Addiction Doesn't Take a Holiday Break |  Why getting help for a loved one really matters now
"It just wouldn't be Christmas without my wife."
"We'll get through the holidays first ... it's not so bad."
"What will the in-laws think when he's not there for Hanukkah?"
"She can't miss work and all of the holiday functions; that would not send a good message."
This time of year, Bob Poznanovich is accustomed to hearing all kinds of objections to sending a family member to treatment during the holidays. Poznanovich led an intervention company that helped thousands of families find help for a loved one in need of addiction treatment.
"It is amazing to me how many people believe that asking a family member to go to treatment during the holidays is somehow wrong or cruel or too disruptive," says Poznanovich.
"What they don't recognize is that addiction is a family disease. Just like the addicted individual, the family system is sick. Family members become enmeshed and unable to separate right from wrong or truth from lie. And their own denial and codependency issues can become even more pronounced during the holidays when there are so many perceived reasons not to take action."
Poznanovich says families who are at the eye of the storm--living in the midst of active addiction--have a very difficult time knowing what to do. Too often, they resort to enabling behaviors that result in keeping everyone sick.
"There is no doubt that many families are experiencing additional stress and strain in these tough economic times. And the coming holidays can compound this stress. But by not confronting the active addiction, the family only adds to its burdens," he explains.
As with the family, the holiday season can give a person with addiction extra ammunition for avoiding treatment. Some of the more common objections Poznanovich hears are:
"My family needs me and expects me to be here for the holidays."
"There are too many coworkers on vacation; I couldn't possibly leave the office now."
"I'm going to wait until after the holidays and get help then."
Especially during the holidays, other factors come into play that can compound problems associated with substance abuse and addiction. For many, the season is one of great joy and happiness. For others, the holidays bring high stress or feelings of loss or depression. Sometimes family gatherings can exacerbate difficult or unhealthy relationships and cause additional anxiety. Intense end-of-the-year workplace demands combined with must-show holiday parties can place additional pressure to drink or use. There are also many opportunities to celebrate in excess, which can create tremendous challenges for those with addiction and trying to hold it together. On top of all this, the family struggles valiantly to present the image that all is well.
Treatment matters as much during the holiday season as it does throughout the year, says Poznanovich.
"Despite the research, stubborn myths around addiction prevail and are a major factor in keeping people sick by promoting the belief that this is a disease of choice or will."
Poznanovich points out five of the most common myths about addiction:
1. Addicts and alcoholics need to reach rock bottom before they can accept help.
2. Addiction is a willpower problem. People can stop, if they put their mind to it.
3. People don't need treatment. They can stop using if they are really motivated.
4. Treatment just doesn't work.
5. People must want treatment in order for it to be effective.
"Every day we are faced with the challenge of debunking these myths and carrying the message that addiction is a chronic illness that can and must be treated," says Poznanovich.
During the holiday season, Poznanovich too often encounters yet another dangerous myth: That it is wrong or inappropriate or cruel to go to treatment during the holiday season. Like the other addiction myths, this simply isn't true, he says.
In fact, says Poznanovich, the holidays may be the best time of the year for people to get healthy and reclaim their lives from addiction.
"Homes that play host to active addiction are not filled with joy and happiness during the holidays; they are decked with dysfunction, stress, fear, and shame."
For families besieged by addiction, the greatest gift they could give their addicted loved one--and themselves--is the gift of recovery.
November 2010 |
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 In the spirit of the holidays, I present for you a Hanukkah trivia quiz (or Chanukah, if you prefer). Take a try at the following trivia, and we'll see how many Menorah candles you deserve!
1. What Jewish family gave its name to the resistance group whose victory over the Syrians Hanukkah commemorates?
2. How many days did the single-day's-worth of lamp oil burn for in the Second Temple (another event the holiday celebrates)?
3. What chant is traditionally sung during the lighting of the Menorah?
4. Potato pancakes are a traditional food eaten during this holiday. What are they called in Yiddish?
5. What is the traditional spinning top game that children (and adults!) play during Hanukkah?
6. What are the gifts children traditionally received called (in remembrance of the coins made by the new Maccabee state)?
7. What does the word "Hanukkah" mean?
8. From which direction to which direction are the Menorah candles lit?
9. During which Hebrew month is Hanukkah celebrated?
10. What is the middle (ninth) candle in the Menorah called?
Answers below
 How Do You Rate:
1-3 Correct: You get two candles. Your experience with Hanukkah is limited at best. Go educate yourself about this ancient celebration!
4-6 Correct: You get five candles. You are probably friends with those of the Jewish faith and have picked up a thing or two over the years. Have a latke!
7-10 Correct: Congratulations! You get a full Menorah, lit in all its symbolic glory! Chances are you are Jewish, and so to you I wish a Happy Hanukkah! If not, you have thought of converting or perhaps took a class in college. Either way, enjoy the holiday!
Answers:
1. The Maccabees
2. Eight
3. Hanerot Hallalu
4. Latkes
5. Dreidel
6. Gelt
7. Re-dedication (referring to the Second Temple reclaimed by the Maccabees)
8. Left to right (though they are placed from right to left, just to confuse things, so that the left most-candle-holder is placed on the 8th night and is lit first on that night)
9. Kislev (on the 25th day)
10. Shammash or Server Candle
By April Rondeau in Associated Content |
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| | The stress you experience is not caused by the things that happen around you. Your stress comes from the way you react to those things that happen.
To experience less stress, you do not need to undertake some grand project that will change the world around you. It is simply a matter of observing and adjusting the way you respond to life.
The things that really upset you are able to get to you because you allow them to do so. You may not be able to stop them from happening, yet you can absolutely choose not to obsess over them.
Yes, your stress may indeed be telling you that you need to take some action or another. Yet after you receive the message, there is no need to continue holding on to the stress.
Reducing your stress is as easy as re-directing the focus of your thoughts. The more you practice doing it, the more quickly and naturally it comes.
The thoughts you choose to hold in your mind will determine the amount of stress you have. So choose to leave the stress behind, and put your energy into positive, fulfilling pursuits.
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What's up doc? This carrot and sausage pasta -- that's what. A mouth-watering medley bursting with flavor, it's a dish that doesn't disappoint. Use your noodle and give this carrot-topped pasta a try tonight. Kid-tested, Bugs Bunny approved.
Ingredients
8 oz. pork sausage
1 tbsp. oil
1/2 oz. butter
1/2 onion, chopped
3 carrots
14 oz. tomatoes
4 fluid oz. chicken stock
1 bay leaf
1 tsp. dried oregano
12 oz. pasta (macaroni or rigatoni)
3 oz. freshly grated Parmesan cheese
Seasoning
Methods/steps
If using whole sausage remove meat from skins. Grate and shred the carrots. Puree the tin of tomatoes. Heat the oil and butter in a saucepan and cook the onion until translucent. Add the sausage meat and lightly brown, breaking it up with a fork. Add the carrot and stir for a few minutes. Add the tomatoes, stock bay leaf and oregano and cook, covered over a "low" heat for 30 minutes. Taste for seasoning. Cook and drain pasta. Mix pasta with the sauce, and serve. Serve cheese separately.
Additional Tips
Ready in 1 hour |
Hazelden Treatment Center Ten Book Recommendations | |
If you are looking for something to purchase for your loved one who is in recovery here are some suggestions:
1. 101 Meeting Starters
A Guide to Better Twelve Step Discussions
Author: Mel B.
2. Sought Through Prayer and Meditation
Wisdom from the Sunday 11th Step Meetings at the Wolfe Street Center in Little Rock
Author: William G. Borchert
3. Hi I'm Bill and I'm Old
Reinventing My Sobriety for the Long Haul
Author: William Alexander
4. Each Day a New Beginning
Daily Meditations for Women
Author: Karen Casey
5. Keep Coming Back Gift Book
Humor & Wisdom for Living and Loving Recovery
6. Moments in Between
The Art of a Quiet Mind
7. Acceptance A Way to Serenity
The Way to Serenity and Peace of Mind
Author: Vincent P. Collins
8. Twenty Four Hours a Day Hardcover (24 Hours)
Author: Hazelden Meditations
9. Beginning
Encouragement at the Start of Something New
10. A Gentle Path Through the Twelve Steps
The Classic Guide for All People in the Process of Recovery
Author: Patrick Carnes, Ph.D.
Hazelden, a national nonprofit organization founded in 1949, helps people reclaim their lives from the disease of addiction. Built on decades of knowledge and experience, Hazelden offers a comprehensive approach to addiction that addresses the full range of patient, family, and professional needs, including treatment and continuing care for youth and adults, research, higher learning, public education and advocacy, and publishing.
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California Families - Please see "RSVP" under the Atlanta News section.
Program Director, California
I want to take a moment to thank all you people who are making the world a better place by being in recovery.
Holidays can be a difficult time for some, and an uplifting time for others. If you are suffering a bit from the holiday blues, go back to basics. Make yourself a gratitude list.
This is one of the most basic recovery exercises.
Their three simple steps involved:
1. Make your list.
2. Read it. Read it again out loud.
3. Keep it with you and read it twice a day, don't be afraid to add things
Keep the list handy, and any time you feel a dark mood coming over you, take that list out and read it. One of my friends told me she used to keep it in an envelope and write "open in case of emergency" on the envelope. She told me she'd gone through a lot of envelopes but it never ceased to work for her.
Bill Urell |
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RSVP - Winter Family Weekend - December 10-12
We encourage all families to attend our quarterly Family Weekend Events - whether your family member has been with us for a week or 11 months. These weekends offer a great opportunity to continue mending family relationships. It is also a time to see how your loved one interacts in a community of young adults. We also look foward to meeting with the family members to give you a picture of the progress we have seen and the areas where growth may be necessary. Sometimes residents may not encourage you to come, however, we truly believe it is a healthy commitment to make to your family member's recovery. I look forward to welcoming each and everyone of you on December 10. Please RSVP to me at Kelly@HEROHouse.com by December 3, 2010. Thank you!
The Winter Family Weekend will be held December 10-12. Please SAVE THE DATE for the weekend. We will begin the weekend with a Social Event on Friday evening. Saturday will be filled with workshops for the family and for residents. Sunday will offer opportunity for individual families to meet with staff to discuss your resident. I look forward to seeing you all at our next Family Weekend. California Families are invited to attend the Family Weekend activities.
Hotel for Family Weekend
We have arranged for a HERO House rate at the Springhill Suites by Marriott for Family Weekend. Conveniently located a mile from our campus, it is a wonderful facility. Their website is www.springhillsuites.com/atlkn. You may reserve your suite for $87.00 by contacting Felecia Callahan at 770-218-5550 and ask for the HERO House rate.
Upcoming Events in Atlanta *Street Meals
Sunday, November 7, 2010
12:30 pm - 4:30 pm
The HERO House in partnership with Kashi Atlanta in their Street Meals program for several months now. Street Meals helps alleviate hunger for the homeless population in Atlanta. Street Meals is supported by a dedicated corps of volunteers who are committed to seva - selfless service - as an extension of their yoga practice. Teaching people about the joy of community service is a part of our commitment.
The first Sunday of every month The HERO House residents and staff make and distribute over 250 sack lunches to Atlanta's homeless. The HERO House wanted to create a service opportunity for our residents as we believe that being of service is a major component in bringing about lasting recovery. When discussing how to bring this project to fruition we turned to Kashi Atlanta for support.
We at The HERO House look forward to being part of the change we wish to see in the world!
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*OVO - Cirque du Soleil
Friday, December 17, 2010
4:00 pm
OVO is a headlong rush into a colourful ecosystem teeming with life, where insects work,eat, crawl, flutter, play, fight and look for love in a non-stop riot of energy and movement. The insects' home is a world of biodiversity and beauty filled with noisy action and moments of quiet emotion.
When a mysterious egg appears in their midst, the insects are awestruck and intensely curious about this iconic object that represents the enigma and cycles of their lives.
It's love at first sight when a gawky, quirky insect arrives in this bustling community and a fabulous ladybug catches his eye - and the feeling is mutual.
OVO is overflowing with contrasts. The hidden, secret world at our feet is revealed as tender and torrid, noisy and quiet, peaceful and chaotic. And as the sun rises on a bright new day the vibrant cycle of insect life begins anew.
*High Museum of Art ~ Salvador Dali
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
12:30 pm - 4:30 pm
Astonishing. Brilliant. Provocative.
Meet the man whose art-and personality-were larger than life. Dalí: The Late Work brings together a stunning collection of more than 40 paintings, plus film, sculptures and photographs-many never before seen in public. The exhibition considers for the first time the diverse body of work that Dalí created in the last forty years of his career. Reinventing himself during the 1940s, Dalí used his art to visually explore science, psychology, and religion-as he often said, painting the subject matter of his time.
*Winter Family Weekend
Friday - Sunday, December 10-12, 2010
Tentative Schedule below
Friday evening 7:00 pm The HERO House Holiday Party
Saturday
8:30 am Welcome/Continental Breakfast
9:00 am--12:30 pm Workshops for Families
12:30 pm-1:30 pm Lunch
1:30 pm-5:30 pm Workshops for Families and Residents
Sunday
Individual Family Sessions by Appointment
"Aerodynamically the bumblebee shouldn't be able to fly, but the bumblebee doesn't know that so it goes on flying anyway."
~Mary Kay Ash |
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About The HERO House
The HERO House is a recovery residence for college students in early sobriety. We serve men and women in separate residences, based upon Peer-to-Peer Recovery Support, grounded in the 12-Step process. The HERO House is a community of students in recovery, sharing life experiences and helping each other achieve long term, quality sobriety and a manner of living that will make them outstanding contributors to our society.
Additionally, at the Higher Education Recovery Option, we work with students to return to school and to find the tools necessary to be successful while sober, on a college campus. We tell residents at intake that our program is typically a one-year program; however, we recognize some residents will finish early and some will need additional time. To successfully complete our program, residents need to complete a 12-Step Program, successfully complete one full-time semester of college, and to advance through all four of our levels of competency at The HERO House. |
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